For trade: Janky ass 1989 Toyota Corolla with way too many miles on it, 4-door, piece of shit with peeling paint job, multiple scratches and minor dents. Won’t pass smog, is a threat to the environment. No a/c, clutch slips, transmission is all funky, and the tires are balding. Giant crack in windshield.
Willing to trade for: pack of sugar free gum (jumbo size, not the 25 cent pack), Garbage Pail Kids cards (vintage or new), a skateboard, a bike, a new pair of walking shoes, a large quantity of mescaline, gallon of Absolut, a case of Jolt soda, or some sort of spiritual enlightenment that will free me from needing any one of these things.